Amanda Ripley is an investigative journalist and a New York Times best-selling author. Her most recent book, and the subject of our conversation, is High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out. In this interview, we take a deep dive into some of her book's main ideas, including:
Why high conflicts are a lot like the La Brea Tar Pits.
The four "trip wires" that lead to high conflict, including "the power of the binary."
Why often the best thing you can do in a conflict is first "get straight in your own head."
How finding the "understory" of a conflict can be a source of liberation.
How to creatively break the patterns of high conflict by "stepping out of the dance."
What it means and why it's important to appeal to a "transcendent identity."
And much more (my favorite: Amanda's "food in the fridge" conflict).
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Breaking the patterns of "high conflict": A conversation with author Amanda Ripley.